At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
