that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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