this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize