no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
