would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
