Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Small penises have feelings too.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
