he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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