Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
