what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
