Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
FUCK WHALES
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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