Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
