WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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