its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
I'm really busy with my period
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