I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
