We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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