I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
we're so committed to being not committed
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
