What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
