He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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