If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize