tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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