I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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