I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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