the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
You made out with two different species that night
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
