Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
