You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
