I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
