Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Ketchup is God's man juice
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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