My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
