some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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