I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
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