shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
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