Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
