Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
50% drunk capacity currently
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I want a musical about memes.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
