So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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