I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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