dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
