dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
