Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
