I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
