All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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