So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
operation harelip BJ is a go
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
