so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
