Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize