It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
