Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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