I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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