Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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