Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
