Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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