you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize